Cup of Coffee: March 4, 2024
A notable free agent signs, collusion, Acuña, an old guy signs in Mexico, the Fanatics CEO has complaints, U L Washington, Mort, LeBron, and Baboon House
Good morning!
One of the remaining free agents has found a home. One who just signed last week has a theory about the cold hot stove of the 2023-24 offseason. Atlanta got some bad news about its best player. A familiar name has found a clubs down south. Very down south. The CEO of Fanatics is not happy about all of the criticism of the new uniforms. A memorable player from the 1970s-80s has moved on to Baseball Valhalla.
In Other Stuff a notable NFL reporter has gone to Football Valhalla, which I assume likewise exists. LeBron James did a thing so, as you can imagine, there are some takes. Finally, I have questions about what I am going to refer to as Baboon House. And if you give me £4 million, I’ll make it mine and I will STILL call it Baboon House.
Let’s get at ‘er.
The Daily Briefing
Giants sign Matt Chapman
Free agent third baseman Matt Chapman signed with the San Francisco Giants over the weekend. The signing is, nominally, for three years and $54 million. But like the contract to which fellow Scott Boras client Cody Bellinger just signed with Chicago, this is a so-called “pillow contract” with opt-outs after both the first and second season. He’ll make $20 million in 2024 and, if he does not opt out, he’ll make $18 million in 2025 and $16 million in 2026.
The outcome — Chapman to San Francisco — is what many have expected for months. The deal is far smaller than many expected, however, for a number of reasons. For one, the Blue Jays had placed a qualifying offer on Chapman and the front office of the one team with serious interest in him, the Giants, seems to fetishize draft picks more than most. For another, the Giants just waited him out and no larger market developed for him.
The lack of a market for Chapman came despite the fact that he’s probably the best defensive third baseman in the game, having won his fourth Gold Glove Award last season. There are legitimate questions about his bat, however. Chapman has posted some gaudy home run totals but overall he’s been just a slightly above average hitter. Last season’s overall numbers — .240/.330/.424 (108 OPS+) with 17 homers — mask the fact that he started extremely quickly but was far, far worse than his season line for most of the year. He also strikes out to beat the band. Hitting in Oracle Park may be a challenge for him as well.
Still, Chapman represents a huge defensive upgrade for the Giants and if he can generate even a little offensive upside it’ll be a nice signing, especially at that price.
Enrique Hernández suggests MLB clubs are colluding
On Thursday Enrique Hernández appeared on the YouTube baseball talk show "Foul Territory" and suggested that owners are colluding against free agents.
Specifically, he said that in his own market, which concluded with his signing back in Los Angeles last week, “The timing of the calls [from teams] was very similar. The numbers were pretty much the same throughout." He also said "I think the teams that are using these computer systems to project numbers, project salaries, they're all using the same one and I think they all have the same password.” He added, "I'm not going to say the C-word, but I think the C-word needs a capital C."
Suggestions of collusion have arisen multiple times in recent years when the free agent market has been slow. And, of course, Major League Baseball clubs have a long and rich history of conspiring to suppress salaries and not sign free agents. That said, I’d need to see and hear more before I’m willing to believe that collusion with a capital C is actually afoot this year.
I say that because one can make a pretty decent case that most of the bigger name free agents who lingered and still linger on the market — Bellinger, Chapman, Blake Snell — have some red flags about them in terms of durability and consistency. It’s not like a few years back when genuine bluechip dudes like Manny Machado and Bryce Harper hadn’t signed by the time pitchers and catchers reported. It’s also with noting that most of the notable late signees this time around are represented by Scott Boras, who can be pretty aggressive in valuing his guys. It’s possible that he and his clients have just overplayed their hand. The union keeps its eye on these things, but I’m guessing even the union knows that, given this free agent class, one would need to see more than just a slow market.
Honestly, I think the bigger issue is not teams colluding as such. It’s that a whole hell of a lot of teams simply don’t have an interest in improving themselves and aren’t interested in free agents who could help them. That’s a shared mindset across Major League Baseball, but it’s merely a regrettable one, not an illegal one.
Ronald Acuña Jr. has a bum knee
There’s some worry in Atlanta after reigning NL MVP Ronald Acuña Jr. was scratched from Friday’s game with knee soreness. This came a day after he tweaked it while in a rundown. Acuña underwent an MRI and it was revealed that he has irritation around the meniscus in his right knee. That’s the same knee in which he tore the ACL in 2021.
Still, Atlanta is being optimistic, saying that, while he’ll probably miss a considerable about of spring training action, he is not expected to miss Opening Day. For his part, Acuña posted "I'LL BE BACK" on his Twitter account on Saturday. Immediately below that this exchange occurred, in case you wanna know why I never got deeply involved in Atlanta Baseball Club social media back when I was a hardcore Atlanta fan:
I can’t decide if it’s funnier that this dude is citing Nick Markakis as an example to one of the best baseball players on Planet Earth or that, in an effort to criticize said player, he has to pull out a “you hustle TOO MUCH” argument. I have a life so I don’t have time to go through my man’s timeline here, but I’m willing to bet that “lack of hustle” is a far, far more common criticism on his part, especially to certain sorts of players, and I’ll leave it at that.
Robison Canó signs with Mexican League team
Robinson Canó has signed with the Diablos Rojos del México of the Mexican League.
Canó, 41, hung ‘em up in 2022 after a miserable 104 plate appearances across 33 games for three different clubs. That came after he missed the entire 2021 season due to his second PED suspension. He hit .221/.244/.299 with a home run and 12 runs batted in in 32 winter league games this past offseason. Apparently he still feels good enough to contribute someplace, but I suspect that at this point even the Mexican League will prove too much for him. We’ll see.
That said, the timing of this is fun as the club for which he emerged as a star, the New York Yankees, is scheduled to play Diablos Rojos in a couple of split squad exhibitions in Mexico City on March 24-25. It’s been 11 years since Canó last wore pinstripes, so I don’t think one can call this a reunion, really, but you know there will be some photos of Canó hanging out with some Yankees players before or after the game which the New York press will talk up.
Fanatics CEO complains about criticism of the new uniforms
Major League Baseball, Nike, and Fanatics have taken all kinds of heat for the crappy new uniforms this spring. On Friday the CEO of Fanatics, Michael Rubin, complained that criticism of his company is unfair.
Speaking at the Sloan Sports Analytics Conference at MIT Rubin said “We’ve purely been doing exactly as we’re told — we’ve been told we’ve done everything exactly right — and we’re getting the shit kicked out of ourselves every day right now. That’s not fun. Normally when I get beat up it’s because I actually did something wrong.”
While the whining is not a great look, he’s not necessarily wrong here. Nike is who designed the uniforms. Fanatics has certainly earned criticism for its crappy, uninspiring fan merch, but it is merely manufacturing the on-field uniforms on Nike’s orders. If they were deviating from the designs or were otherwise doing it wrong that would’ve leaked by now and Fanatics would be scapegoated. It seems to me that the uniform fiasco is more about Nike coming up with a crap design in an effort to save on costs for a product that doesn’t really make them much money, with Major League Baseball blithely approving the new designs while it focuses on things more important to it like which company will be pay it to be “The Official Non-Nutritive Cereal Varnish Supplier of Major League Baseball.” Uniforms cost money but sponsorships make money, so it’s obvious where Rob Manfred’s priorities lie.
Rubin is certainly pointing the finger at Nike:
“In this particular case, Nike designs everything, hands us a spec and says, ‘Make this.’ We have made everything exactly to the spec. Nike and baseball would say, yes, you’ve done everything we’ve asked you to do. Part of changing a uniform is people get uncomfortable, and it takes time (to adjust).”
Rubin says that Nike didn’t get enough player input with respect to the changes. Which is almost certainly right. He also says that, ultimately, once some tweaks are made to the current designs, people will love them. That seems way less likely, but it makes sense when you appreciate that this is Fanatics talking and that Fanatics whole business model is to use its near-monopoly power to sell substandard product with no regard for consumer preference or happiness. In such a case, “love” is irrelevant enough to where the concept can be thrown out all willy-nilly like that because, hey, whaddaya gonna do?”
U L Washington: 1953-2024
U L Washington, who played 11 seasons in the bigs between 1977 and 1987 has died at the age of 70. He was being treated for cancer in recent months so, presumably, that or some complication related to it was the cause of death.
The first thing you should know about U L Washington is that the U and the L were not initials. U L was his given name. When he signed autographs or put his name on legal documents he’d put dots next to them because it just looked better, but as far as his family and the government were concerned he was U L. That is pretty cool in my book.
The second thing to know about him was that he was not drafted out of high school in Oklahoma nor after the one season he played for Murray State college. Rather, he was product of a rather ahead-of-its-time domestic amateur academy the Kansas City Royals used to operate. He made the academy following a tryout and was one of only three big leaguers to come out of it The other two were quite notable: all-time Royals great Frank White and current Los Angeles Angels manager Ron Washington.
The third thing to know about Washington was that he appeared on what was my favorite baseball card going for many, many years:
Trammell was my favorite player as a kid. Molitor was also a player I liked a lot, but I liked him on this card mostly because it looked like his photo was hand-painted. As for Mickey Klutts: he’d play only eight games for the Yankees over three seasons because Bucky Effin’ Dent wasn’t going anyplace. He’d go on to serve as a backup for the A’s for several seasons. As for Washington: he just looked cool. Trammell and Klutts were a bit deer-in-the-headlights. Molitor looked like he was getting ready to perform some Shakespeare or something. Washington looks as though he has seen some shit and is trying to decide if you were worth telling about it. You probably weren’t.
The last thing to know about U L Washington was the thing everyone knows about U L Washington:
That toothpick. It was practically omnipresent. I remember listening to Tigers-Royals games on the radio and Ernie Harwell or Paul Carey would mention it. George Kell mentioned it on the Tigers TV broadcast once and Al Kaline, who was doing color commentary, did the classic “Little Leaguers at home, don’t do what Washington does with the toothpick, because if you fall down or collide with someone you could hurt yourself” thing. Of course a whole lot of us did it anyway because, again, U L Washington was cool.
Washington was a career .251/.313/.342 (82 OPS+) hitter in eight seasons for the Royals, a season with the Expos, and two seasons with the Pirates. He played in four postseasons with the Royals, including for the 1980 AL pennant-winning team, though he was unfortunately gone for the 1985 World Series win. After his playing career he coached in the Pirates, Royals, Dodgers, Twins, and Red Sox organizations. He took the field at shortstop for a couple of games in 1992, when he was in his late 30s, while he was coaching the Memphis Chicks. He notably helped a very young Mookie Betts improve his power stroke while Betts was in the low minors. So yeah, that worked out.
Rest in peace U L Washington. Saint Peter: grab a box of Diamond rounds for our friend here.
Other Stuff
Chris Mortensen: 1951-2024
ESPN’s longtime NFL correspondent Chris Mortensen has died at the age of 72. I have not seen a cause of death but he had been dealing with throat cancer several years ago.
It’s been many years since I was a regular ESPN viewer, but it’s really astounding how so many of the network’s personalities from what many, myself included, consider to be its golden age in the 1990s are gone now. Stuart Scott. John Clayton. John Saunders. Mortensen. Others I’m sure.
Time stops for no one, but Jesus, can is slow down just a bit?
The takes, they burn
LeBron James broke the 40,000-point barrier on Saturday night. It’s an accomplishment that even long-lapsed NBA fans such as myself can appreciate. I understand that one will never break through generational prejudices regarding who the best basketball player of all time is, but I think it’s fair to say that never has a player been as good as LeBron has been for as long as he’s been. He’s had a simply astonishing career.
Then you wake up on Sunday morning and see things like this:
When Enes Freedom, the MAGA crowd’s basketball hero is only the second-dumbest person in a two-person Twitter thread you know there is some awfulness afoot.
As for the dumbest: (a) Karl Malone did not stay with one franchise; and (b) Malone impregnated a minor — who gave birth to their son at the fucking age of 13 — when he was in his 20s, then ghosted on the kid for his entire childhood, so please spare me any talk of integrity in connection with that man.
I get that there is a big contingent of Boomer/Gen-X basketball fans who, for reasons which have never once been adequately explained, have decided that LeBron James represents everything that’s wrong with the game, but Jesus dudes, clean it up.
Baboon House
I was fantasizing about being insanely wealthy the other day so I spent a few minutes, as one does, checking out crazy-expensive real estate in central London.
Which is not always satisfying, by the way. Like many major cities around the worls, London has become a place where rich oil barons, Russian oligarchs, and international criminals and quasi-criminals launder money by purchasing expensive houses and apartments and either (a) don’t live in them, which simultaneously drives up real estate prices and hollows out the livable fabric of neighborhoods; or (b) live in them and turn them into ugly places that look not unlike Tony Montaña’s pad in “Scarface,” complete with lots of black, glass-topped furniture, carpeted bathrooms and all of the other traits which make Baby Real Estate Jesus cry.
All of which is to say that when I look at London real estate it quickly becomes less an exercise in wealth fantasy than a game in which I try to find an inoffensive place in a sea of soullessness or abject grossness. It’s a pretty fun game sometimes! Like when you find a house with a painting of a man who looks either like a young Winston Churchill or, perhaps, Jason Isbell, standing next to a baboon:
But then it gets even better when, later in the listing, you find the actual baboon:
Two additional fun things about this listing:
- There’s one of those blue plaques on the house which says that Leonard Woolf, the husband/widower of Virginia Woolf, and a writer/publisher in his own right, once lived here. Which, given that it is in Bloomsbury, makes sense. Based on photos I could find of Woolf, however, he is not the man in the painting with the baboon. If subscriber/Virginia Woolf aficionado Levi Stahl has any insight about this, I would love to know more. But I must stress: my interest in Leonard Woolf is incidental. I’m far more interested in the baboon business; and
- The listing notes that “The owners have had the history of the house chronicled in a book by a professional researcher which they are willing to pass on to the purchaser.” So I could, theoretically, get the answer to my baboon questions, but I doubt they’ll let me see it unless I buy the place, so if anyone has £3,950,000 they can shoot me we’ll get to the bottom of this whole deal.
Thank you for your assistance in this matter.
Have a great day everyone.
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